I’m blessed to have a service dog, but the reason behind her is FA

A couple of weekends ago, someone said something I hear all too often: “You are so lucky to be able to bring your dog with you.”

I know they meant it kindly, but my first thought was, “Lucky?” Wendy is not just my dog. She is my service dog.

Wendy helps me manage daily life. She picks up what I drop, helps me navigate the world from my wheelchair, and gives me confidence in places that can feel awkward or overwhelming.

I need that help because I have Friedreich’s ataxia (FA), a progressive condition that affects my motor skills. Wendy offers that help with a golden retriever smile and a wagging tail, but the need behind it comes from something I never would have chosen.

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Having Wendy by my side blesses me every day. Needing her does not. I try to hold both truths at once. Wendy brings comfort, confidence, and laughter into my life, and I feel grateful for her in ways words cannot capture.

Still, gratitude does not erase why she walks beside me. I did not get a service dog for privilege, attention, or companionship. I got Wendy because my body needs help with things that once felt simple and ordinary.

I see tenderness in the way she works. If I drop my phone, a pen, a credit card, or the same piece of paper three times in a row, she never makes me feel embarrassed. She simply lowers her head, picks it up, and places it back in my hand.

When I need help opening a door, moving through a tight space, or getting someone’s attention, Wendy steps in. She turns frustrating moments into calmer ones. She gives me more independence, and I appreciate that differently now that I have had to fight to keep it.

Am I lucky?

When people call me lucky, I know most of them mean well. They see a beautiful dog beside me and respond with joy. Wendy does bring joy. She is funny, smart, and affectionate, and she can make strangers smile before they say hello. But I wish they could also hear the sentence underneath my smile: Yes, I feel blessed to have her, but I would not need her if FA had not changed the way I move through the world.

I can feel thankful for help without wanting to need it. That difference can be hard to explain without sounding ungrateful, and I am anything but ungrateful. Wendy has made my life bigger. She helps me leave the house with more confidence, softens the sharp edges of disability in public, and reminds me that assistance can protect my dignity rather than take it away.

That is what I wish people could see when they call me lucky. The blessing is not bringing a dog everywhere. The blessing is Wendy helping me participate in life with more ease, safety, and confidence. She turns limitation into possibility. But the reason for the blessing still carries loss. I live with a progressive condition that affects my body in ways I did not choose.

So, yes, Wendy is a blessing. She makes hard things easier and lonely things less lonely. She gives me confidence, independence, and joy. But I am not lucky to have FA. I am not lucky to need a service dog. I am blessed to have the right dog beside me in a life that sometimes asks more of me than I expected.

Wendy will retire in September after about nine years of service, and she has earned every bit of that rest. Soon she will become my pet, and I will begin again with a new service dog. I trust that my new dog will bring kindness and patience, too, but that dog will not be Wendy. She has carried me through this chapter with grace, humor, and loyalty. Even when the reason for her presence hurts, the gift of her help will always feel holy.

Note: Friedreich’s Ataxia News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Friedreich’s Ataxia News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Friedreich’s ataxia.